Thursday, April 2, 2009

Cullenism Religion: An Update

Here's an update to my original post, which has garnered a great deal of buzz over the net thanks to the Twilight Examiner today. Seems with all the hype about this "religion," the boards are down and closed to guest posters.


Picture courtesy of 4TNZ

I did find, however, a little more detail into the "Cullenism" religion:

In the grand scheme of Cullenism, there are four gods and now four goddesses that we pray to; Edward, Bella, Carlisle, Esme, Jasper, Alice, Emmett and Rosalie, each god can (and probably will) have a different significance to each Cullenist. However, each Cullen god is unique in his or her own way.

Edward is the god of protection, chivalry and game.
Bella is the god of Insecurities, Closure and beginnings
Carlisle is the god of health and prosperity.
Esme is the god of care and compassion.
Jasper is the god of war, stradegy and educational pursuit.
Alice is the god of fashion, fun and love.
Emmett is the god of strength, friendliness and happiness.
Rosalie is the god of beauty and grace.

In turn, each god/godess can be prayed to for different reasons, at differnt times, some, you may pray to regularly, others on occasion. Each god is equally as amazing as the next. There may be different reason you pray to a certain one, whether it's because you're part of their house, or because they're your favorite Cullen, or perhaps it's because you're in need of their specific guidence.

*Each god/godess will eventually have their own lesson and a few prayers, feel free to pm me your suggestions!*

Hopefully, this was a resourceful and provided some good information. May the Cullens bless you, may the road rise to meet you, may the wind be ever at your back, may the sun shine warm upon your face and the rain fall soft upon your fields.

45 comments:

  1. Um. Yes. I'm afraid it is. Scary, eh?

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  2. I'm DEF not going to TwiCon now! That is the scariest!!

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  3. Ummm... "stradegy"??? "guidence"??? Really?!? I'm sorry [okay not really] - call me a snob - but if you can't spell and aren't even capable of using spellcheck, perhaps you should reconsider starting your own religion. Just sayin'...
    P.S. But should you insist upon doing so against my better judgment, please make up your own blessings and don't steal from the Irish. We don't roll like that.

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  4. Where are you finding your information?

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  5. oh gosh. let the people believe. well, i'm cullenist. and i love to be. i don't care with the bad comments.

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  6. i was an original twilight reader- i read it when it first came out- and i really enjoy the series., im going to go out on a limb and say i love them. and i understand fansights and blogs but a religion, i understand you have a right to express yourself but aren't you taking it a little far? im not going to completely trash your idea and if you want to do this i say power to you- i might even check in every so often to see whats up. so i have absolutely no condenention torwards you for it. so good uck in the sense of the word "Cullenist" i am not going to worship them but it is still interesting to read your page. best of luck with your page and don't allow people to look down their nose at you. ok? check on it soon - bye :)

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  7. I personally like Twilight and I don't see how Cullenism has done any harm. Let the kids have their fun!

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  8. That is SICK AND WRONG!!

    Parents need to moniter what their kids are doing. Especially if their kids are joining some wacked-out religion based off of a fictional book series.

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  9. ... Holy shit....

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  10. you xcore twilight fans who take part in this do realise that you come off as crazy, sick bitches right? and the whole world is laughing at you. just so you know.

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  11. ...are you fucking serious?
    A RELIGION, on THOSE books?
    What's next? A law saying everyone in the world has to read them?
    My God, what is this world coming to...

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  12. I love the Twilight books... but you have got to be fucking kidding me.
    This is so damn pathetic.

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  13. ....what? What? WHAT?!

    Are you... fucking kidding me? This is goddamned pitiful. I mean... religion? On books, nonetheless?

    ...Wow. Just... wow. This is fucking pathetic. Goddamn. I'm letting my faith in humanity fly out the window now.

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  14. Lol well, Scientology began because of a fictional book too, so I'm sad to say that I'm not surprised that people are stupid enough to make a Twilight religion(and I use that term lightly).

    Go ahead and make yourself look like morons, as long as it doesn't make people give the religion money/ condem medicine. (Like scientology does)

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  15. L. Ron Hubbard, where are you when a pseudo-religion based off a fictional book needs guidance?

    And Cullenists, PROTIP: Abuse works. It worked in Twilight, and it works in Scientology.

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  16. im pretty sure most of my brain cells just died

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  17. And this is why Twilight will bring the apocalypse. Faith in Humanity : DEAD

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  18. ...Really?

    A religion?

    They're NOT real. For God's sakes, get some help!

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  19. Are you MOTHER FUCKING KIDDING ME?! That is going too goddamned far! I'm offended by this. The churches hate Harry Potter, but Twilight has a religion, worshiping the Cullen family as Gods and Goddesses, and it's just fine?

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  20. http://koltchak91120.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/facepalm.jpg

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  21. If I find I church dedicated to this freak of a religion I'll alert anonymous.

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  22. /calls God

    "Hey God there's a religion based of a book series called Twilight."
    "What the hell!"
    "That's what I said"
    "Hold on let me get my lightning bolts and seven trumpets"
    "OK back. Now im going to strike them all down."
    "Thank you God"
    /hangs up

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  23. my god twilight justs sucks but this?! twilights the worst series ever

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  24. That. Is. Pathetic.
    They're fictional characters! They're not, and never will be real. How far is this going to go? Oh, God...what is this world coming to?

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  25. >.> so this is how all religions begins I guess?

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  26. *headdesk*

    Oh my goodness, What is this world coming to?

    This is unhealthy; they're *fictional* characters! What are your parents teaching you?

    I'm repulsed by your ignorance. Get some help. Now.

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  27. I see alot of comments about fictional characters and fictional books... But the same could be said for ANY religion... Christianity, many could and would say the bible is fiction... Muslim, the Quran could be called fiction, Scientology, etc, etc, etc.... Its not hurting anyone so i dont see the big deal... everyone needs someone to pray to...

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  28. But praying to an abusive boyfriend? THat is pushing it.

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  29. Yeah but the thing is, NO ONE ever said "ohhh this book about God/Zeus/Shiva/Budda/Osiris is a fictional book!" That's the difference, these gods/God were created to explain how natural events occured. Hell, most teach a moral lesson or multiple ones!

    Twilight is a fictional book, it does nothing more than entertain. Stephanie Meyer herself even admitted that there are NO themes or messages in the book so what are you supposed to get out of it other than jacking off to how hot Edward Mcsparkles is?

    And THAT'S why I think seriously (not in a joking haha lets have fun way) believing in these characters is IDIOTIC and delusional. (Same thing can be said for Scientology.)

    Seriously, worshipping Twilight is as crazy as someone worshipping Superman or Wonder Woman. (well, at least THEY have a message to send out to their fans...)

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  30. I hope real vampires slaughter every last follower of this horseshit. It would go a long way to weeding out pollutants in the gene pool.

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  31. One these people are not God's, they are actors!2 there is only one God Jesus christ! 3 , yeah keep praying to what you think is the cullen gods and you'll soon find out what you're really praying to a demon!You people are sick worshipping false idols.

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  32. Ok..I've read a lot of things in my time. Plenty of good books and even books that have left me awestruck by their power. Before anybody goes accusing me, I have read the twilight series in full twice. They are exceptionally well written books that provide a provocation of emotional appeal. But they are by no means, any "bible". The Cullens are FICTIONAL (that means NOT REAL) characters. They are not gods to be idolized. They are not things to be put on an altar and worshiped. If your going to worship anything, worship the fact that you have a life to live. Not some fictional character from a book. I find it highly offensive that fans would stoop to this level of...for lack of better words, idiocy. The twilight series is a good series, but they are not meant to be bibles. And for sanity's sake...making gods and goddesses out of the characters? It's just not natural. If your going to worship something, worship the earth that supports you and the stars that guide you. Something real. For goodness sakes get a life. And don't use the Irish Blessing as your parting blessing. GET YOUR OWN WORDS YOU OAFS! Have some originality, some creativity. Stop being delisuonal little fan girls who have nothing better to do then sit around all day reading and "praying" to false, fake, and completely fictional characters that come from a god damned book. This whole development of a "religion" makes me ashamed to call myself a fan of twilight. It really does.

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  33. One: You DO know that 'pillow-biter' is (or was) slang for a homosexual, yes?

    Two: This is utterly retarded. An entire religion based on a fat mentally-deficient Mormon's fantasy novel? Seriously? SERIOUSLY? Is there something in the water fueling a drastic drop in IQ?

    Unless this all just an elaborate prank. But in the offchance it isn't, if any of these dipshits come near where I live I reserve the right to stab them in their sparkly little hearts and cut their throats.

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  34. I want to put myself in Cullens
    Edward and his true beauty ... ... aaaaaaaaaaah
    I just look stupid with this message.
    In fact, I'm French!

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  35. HOLY SHIT! I have something to say about each of these gods.

    Bella is the goddess of insecurities, Closure, and beginnings?
    Closure? How did you get that?
    Insecurities? So you want us to feel worse about ourselves?

    Edward is the god of protection, Chivalry, and game?
    Protection? He causes a girl to become suicidal. He hurts someone emotionally which is often worse then physically because it DOESN'T GO AWAY.
    Chivalry? Try controlling.
    Game. Okay i get that he plays games with Bella and toys with her.

    Carlisle is the god of Health and Prosperity?
    He's the god of health yet we never see him save a life or hear of it. All I ever hear about is him damning people.

    Esme is the goddess of care and compassion? So the person who has all of about 25 lines in the whole first book if that is all caring? True Esme isn't too bad but still.

    Jasper is the god of war, strategy, and educational pursuit? So war is a good thing now. We should Pray for war? I don't even pray but if I did i would pray that we had one day when no one died (Nickelback is awesome).

    Alice is the goddess of fashion, fun, and love? So we should all dress how Alice think we should? We should give up our own favorite colors and so what Alice wants because she knows SO much? Umm thanks but I think I'll keep my gir shirt and silver jeans no matter what Alice says.

    Emmett is the god of strength, friendliness and happiness? How many friends does Emmett have again? That aren't and never will be a Cullen?

    Rosalie is the goddess of Beauty and grace? So if I'm not blond and have a perfect body then I'm not pretty? I'm I have brown hair, green eyes, and I'm sure as hell not perfect. However I am just fine with how I look and so are some guys I know. So you know what Rosalie I will look however I want and be okay with it. Also Grace? I'm on a dance team and that takes grace. Wasn't Alice always described as the dancer?

    Some people have said this isn't hurting anyone. This is untrue. Any Twi-hard that joins this must be very hard core. This are the ones that beat up, threaten, emotionally harm, and hurt in any possible way a person who says they don't like twilight. Yes this does happen. I was threatened over the internet in a review for my Maximum ride fanfiction for few lines that made fun of Edward. Twilight has hurt people. This is a major issue for me. I am lucky and haven't been hurt by a Twi-hard. Others aren't so lucky. Still think Cullenism is okay?

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  36. If any one of you twitards comes within 4 miles of my house, I will f*cking shoot you. I am not kidding.

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  37. MAny religions are based on fiction. Like the bible. I guess twilight is a better book to read than the bible. I dont think there would be as many crazy followers in twilight than a christian theyre much worse. They think even harry potter is evil

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  38. this site is evidence that the world is soon coming to an end.

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  39. OH. MY. GAAAAWWWWD.

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  40. YAY FOR TROLLING TWITARDS!

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  41. I see lots of ppl are getting troll'd or asking for it.

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  42. Im not a christian, but the Bible is more entertaining than the Twatlight books.

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  43. You all fail at life! First you think they're real, now you think their Gods. I'll tell you this. THERE ARE NO SUCH THING AS VAMPIRES, WEREWOLVES OR GODS!!! To believe in those is like believing in Santa Claus. Please grow up, get a life and stop doing stupid things like this. If you did society wouldn't frown upon you as much as they do now. Society that hasn't been affected . . .

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  44. You Twi-hards are just breaking half of the 10 Commandments.

    1.) You shall have no other gods before Me.
    2.) You shall not have an idol.
    3.) You shall not say God's name in vain.
    4.) Remember the Sabbath Day.
    5.) Honor your Mother & Father
    6.) You shall not murder
    7.) You shall not commit adultery
    8.) You shall not steal
    9.) you shall not give false testimony against you neighbor
    10.) You shall not covet your neighbor's goods.

    So how many of them are broken? Who knows, I'm not a Twi-fan, nor shall I ever be one. But I'm sure that the Twi-fans has broken the MOST important ones of all.
    Let's see how this will all come out on Judgment Day.....

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