Today I was shocked and amused to find that her brother is a unicorn. For those Twi-novices, a unicorn is defined as:
unicorn (n). A man who reads Twilight.
Here's an excerpt:
I figured the movie conversation was going to be the end of the Twilight saga between myself and Brother Jerkface. However, he calls me last night to
BJ - I finished reading that vampire book last night.
JJ - Oh yeah? What did you think?BJ - It was like Nancy Drew meets Interview with a Vampire
JJ - I guess...
BJ - I told my wife I needed a training bra when I was done reading it.
JJ - Ha! Ha! You're such a turd
BJ - I didn't understand why Bella wets her pants every time she accidentally touches the vampire
JJ - He's cold to touch. Ice cold.
BJ - So she pees herself?
JJ - {{{Sigh}}} You just don't get it.
BJ - You know what I didn't like about the book?
JJ - Everything?
BJ - The fact that the vampires don't kill anyone.
JJ - They're vegetarians.
BJ - That's stupid. Even the bad vampires aren't scary. Getting chased by James is like getting chased by the lead singer of Warrant. Or Milli Vanilli.
JJ - [Hangs up phone because she's laughing too hard to respond]
* Note: Most boys will never understand our fascination with the series. But sometimes it's just fun to watch them try.
Ha ha! Pillow Biter, you rock!
ReplyDeleteI think I'm going to start calling him Uni. But not tell him why... I'm a mean sister, what can I say.
LOL- Love it!
ReplyDeleteLOL!! If JJ's brother found out that his "Unicorn" status had been made public, JJ might have to enter the witness protection program (but it would be totally worth it).
ReplyDeleteNow THAT would be something to blog about! ;)
ReplyDelete